My mind should be a well of inspiration, or something like that. This year I've felt a bit impaired on a cognitive level and I'm fighting against it. I think there is a certain amount of anxiety that I just can't bear anymore, and I'm now able to dispel it. It's not the kind of anxiety that you are aware of, but the one that you resent once you've recognised it in retrospective, as in a past life with past actions.
I miss being able to concentrate on my thoughts and perceptions, although in a way I'm more focused than ever, which is strange. I'm trying to do just one thing at a time and really be anchored on it rather than skidding and diverging.
I'm also ready to challenge each event of my life, each thought, each breath, which is exhausting and I should do slowly, although it's exciting too.
I'm worried that I'll stay in this state forever, it's been a long time, but on the other hand I'm more intelligent on an emotional level and that's a huge improvement over the way I used to think and feel. Something is cooking in my subconscious, I just hope it's going to bring me back to being sharp and ready for quick thinking and creating.
I miss being able to concentrate on my thoughts and perceptions, although in a way I'm more focused than ever, which is strange. I'm trying to do just one thing at a time and really be anchored on it rather than skidding and diverging.
I'm also ready to challenge each event of my life, each thought, each breath, which is exhausting and I should do slowly, although it's exciting too.
I'm worried that I'll stay in this state forever, it's been a long time, but on the other hand I'm more intelligent on an emotional level and that's a huge improvement over the way I used to think and feel. Something is cooking in my subconscious, I just hope it's going to bring me back to being sharp and ready for quick thinking and creating.
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